Denial: The Worst Timeshare You’ll Ever Inherit
- Antonia Kenny
- Jun 6
- 3 min read
By Antonia @UnremarkableMePublished: June 2025
Let’s Talk About Denial
Not the cool, off-grid kind of denial where you bin your WiFi, raise goats, and learn the banjo. No—we’re talking about the chronic-illness version. The one where your body is basically filing HR complaints in triplicate while you insist, “I’m fine!” with the conviction of a collapsing deckchair.
Here’s the kicker: denial isn’t a stage. It’s a bloody timeshare. It comes with throw pillows embroidered with “I’m just tired”, a full minibar of plausible excuses, and—bonus!—you’ll get applauded for living there.
“Wow, you’re so strong!”No, Karen. I’m just too knackered to argue with gravity today.
Denial Doesn’t Look Like the Movies
It’s not some Oscar-worthy “this can’t be happening!” monologue. Denial looks like:
Cancelling the medical appointments you definitely need
Blaming your weird symptoms on “that one time you slept funny”
Smiling through a flare like a budget animatronic in a cursed Disney ride
Scheduling back-to-back Zoom meetings to prove you're “still normal” (spoiler: define normal)
And in case you’re wondering:You’re not fooling anyone. Including yourself.
Signs You’re Deep in Denial (Like, Up to Your Eyebrows)
If you’ve uttered any of the following in the past week, congrats—you may be operating a full-service pop-up in Denialville:
“It’s just stress.” (It’s never just stress, especially after your third fall this month.)
“I’m fine.” (You’re wearing two heat pads and a pain patch shaped like Tasmania.)
“It’ll pass.” (So will gallstones. That doesn’t mean you ignore them.)
“I’ll just push through.” (Push through what, exactly? Your own nervous system?)
Denial feels functional—for a while. Until you’re rage-Googling “can you die from pretending to be okay?” at 3 a.m. with a hot water bottle duct-taped to your hip like a war wound.
So, What Can You Actually Do Instead?
No incense. No “healing crystal moon cleanse.” Just mildly helpful ideas before your body files for divorce:
Write it down.Not for deep journaling—think receipts. Note every time you’ve said “I’m fine” while actively bleeding from the soul.
Reality check with a friend.Ask: If someone else said this to me, would I believe them? If the answer is “hell no,” congrats—you’ve gaslit yourself.
Text someone the truth.Literally: “Hey, I think I’m pretending to be okay and it’s backfiring.” No TED Talk needed. Just honesty, 1 (1) message long.
Go to the bloody doctor.Yes, again. Yes, even if they’re annoying. “It’s probably fine” is not a medical degree.
Stop scheduling like you're on The Apprentice.No one’s handing out awards for collapsing in the cereal aisle.
Actually Useful Places That Aren’t a Denial Spiral
Trust me, they’ve all seen worse than whatever brand of chaos your week’s offering up.
What Kindness Really Looks Like
When I say “be kind to yourself,” I don’t mean bath bombs and manifesting with herbal tea. I mean:
Cancelling plans without guilt
Telling the truth when someone asks how you're doing
Sitting down before you fall over
Taking the meds, eating the food, phoning the GP
Logging off when a support group turns into an emotional Olympics
Kindness isn’t cute. It’s survival. It means giving yourself permission to be a bit crap sometimes—because forcing yourself to be impressive 24/7 is how you end up horizontal, furious, and regretting everything (and possibly with a slipped disc).
Final Thought
Denial isn’t evil. But it is a time-waster. And frankly, you've got better things to do—like live your life. Messily. Honestly. Imperfectly.
No affirmations. No fake pep talks.Just facts, rest, and maybe… fewer apologies.
Stay strong my chronically ill friends.
Love,Unremarkable Me
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