Let’s Talk About Self-Care & Chronic Illness
- Antonia Kenny
- Mar 22
- 3 min read
Ah, self-care—the magical solution peddled everywhere from Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop empire to your mate Sarah’s Instagram feed. Bubble baths, yoga retreats, overpriced candles… it’s all presented as the ultimate recipe for happiness. But for those of us living with chronic illnesses, self-care isn’t about indulgence—it’s about sheer survival. Ironically, it’s also usually the first thing to fly out the window when life gets tough. But why exactly is self-care so stigmatized and misunderstood, especially for the chronically ill? Buckle up—let’s dive into this ironically exhausting paradox with the charm of someone who recently drove their wheelchair straight into a Holland & Barrett display.
Why Chronic Illness Turns Self-Care into a Cruel Joke
Self-care is already challenging when you’re healthy, juggling jobs, relationships, and remembering to put the bins out. Add chronic illness, and it feels harder than solving advanced Sudoku while blindfolded.
The Spoon Theory Strikes AgainIf your body feels powered by second-hand batteries, every activity demands spoons you don’t have. Showering? Too exhausting. Cooking? Ha! Hygiene? Sometimes optional. You’re using your last spoon just staying upright.
Pain Makes Everything a NightmareImagine your body yelling “NO!” every time you attempt anything remotely normal. Showering feels like scaling Everest, cooking resembles competing unwillingly on The Great British Bake Off, and yoga? Absolutely hilarious.
Guilt, the Uninvited GuestChronic illness loves bringing along guilt. You feel guilty saying no, asking for help, or needing rest. You promise yourself you'll rest tomorrow. Spoiler alert: tomorrow never comes.
Society Just Doesn’t Get ItSelf-care for the chronically ill isn't always spa days and Pilates. Often, it's merely surviving the day without tears. But society expects you to smile through pain and keep pace, misunderstanding genuine self-care as laziness or indulgence.
Mental Health’s Constant DramaChronic illness frequently arrives with its besties—depression, anxiety, and brain fog—making self-care even harder. You skip self-care because you feel rubbish, which makes you feel worse, continuing the awful cycle.
Non-Negotiable Self-Care Basics for Every Human
Let’s simplify this. Here’s what everyone—whether you're raising dragons, toddlers, or managing EDS, POTS, and MCAS (a real party!)—should be doing:
Hydrate Like You Mean It: Your body is 60% water. Keep drinking or face dehydration's spiteful sibling, fatigue.
Get Some Sleep: Sleep isn’t weak; it’s genius. Aim for 7-9 hours. Screens in the bedroom? Nope, ditch them like a toxic ex.
Eat Like You Love Yourself: Self-care isn’t kale smoothies—it’s whatever nourishes you, even if that's a cheeky biscuit with your tea.
Move (Gently): Gentle stretching, walking (even if just to the fridge), or seated exercises. Keep joints happier than your Amazon delivery driver.
Say No: Boundaries are hot. Protect your energy like it’s the last Jaffa Cake in the packet.
Realistic Self-Care for the Chronically Ill
Here’s the good stuff tailored specifically for our chronic illness warriors:
Microwave Meals Are Absolutely Valid: Cooking is great, but microwaving dinner on low-energy days? Totally acceptable.
Simplify Your Hygiene: Dry shampoo, baby wipes, and a reliable deodorant can save your sanity when showers feel marathon-level daunting.
Adaptive Tools are Your Friends: Shower stools, jar openers—these aren’t crutches, they're allies. Pun fully intended.
Celebrate Tiny Victories: Managed to brush your teeth? Hero. Got dressed? Legend. Ordered pizza instead of cooking? Iconic.
Find Your People: Join online groups or connect with fellow chronically ill friends. Having support from people who truly "get it" changes everything.
Why is There So Much Stigma Around Self-Care?
Self-care is stigmatized primarily because society equates productivity with worth. We’re conditioned to believe rest equals laziness and admitting you need care implies weakness. This perception intensifies for those with chronic illness because their daily reality doesn’t match societal expectations of constant activity and resilience. The myth that self-care is only luxury spa days and Instagram-worthy moments further alienates anyone unable to participate, creating guilt, shame, and a reluctance to prioritize essential self-care.
Let’s Get Real
Self-care isn't always glamorous—often it's mundane, challenging, or even frustrating. But it’s essential. Chronic illness complicates life, but practicing practical self-care like drinking water, setting boundaries, or unapologetically resting can make the difference between surviving and thriving.
So ditch the guilt, embrace the chaos, and put yourself first. After all, if you can laugh through wheelchair mishaps and conquer life’s hurdles (or at least crash into them with style), you’ve already won. Now, go hydrate yourself, you absolute legend.
Sources:
The Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino
Mind.org.uk: Self-care and Mental Health
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